Enlightened ramblings of a minarchist libertarian with Objectivist tendencies

Saturday, June 26, 2004

Bushels of Wheat

Once again today, I baffled beyond speech some poor bastard working at the local convenience store. For your own sake, please learn from my mistake.

So what did I do that had this product of public school education so dumbfounded? I gave him a quarter after he had already rung up my total and looked at the screen to determine my change.

My total, $3.16. I originally gave him $4.00. While he was ringing me up, I dug in my pocket and found a quarter. I offered it to him after he had completed pushing his 4 buttons to determine my change. He just stood there with a blank gaze wondering why I was giving him a quarter. I told him to take the quarter and give me back $1.09 instead of the $.84 he wanted so badly to hand to me.

Again, he looked at the screen on the register and back at my outstretched hand. After a quick explanation as to what it was I was doing and a loud sigh from the lady behind me, he pensively handed over the $1.09. I am sure that as I walked out the door he still had no idea what had just taken place.

Back in 1885, 8th graders in Kansas were expected to know such things as these:

1. Name and define the Fundamental Rules of Arithmetic.
2. A wagon box is 2 ft. deep, 10 feet long, and 3 ft. wide. How many bushels of wheat will it hold?
3. If a load of wheat weighs 3942 lbs., what is it worth at 50 cts. per bu., deducting 1050 lbs. for tare?
4. District No. 33 has a valuation of $35,000. What is the necessary levy to carry on a school seven months at $50 per month, and have $104 for incidentals?
5. Find cost of 6720 lbs. coal at $6.00 per ton.
6. Find the interest of $512.60 for 8 months and 18 days at 7 percent.
7. What is the cost of 40 boards 12 inches wide and 16 ft. long at $20 per m?
8. Find bank discount on $300 for 90 days (no grace) at 10 percent.
9. What is the cost of a square farm at $15 per are, the distance around which is 640 rods?
10. Write a Bank Check, a Promissory Note, and a Receipt.

You think one of them could have given me correct change?

In the future, I will make sure to hand the nice man all my money at once. You should do the same.

Publicity Whore

Since I want this site to be a success, I did something I never do. I sent out a mass email to the 50+ people in my address book. As I was adding the names, I realized that I didn't even remember who some of them were.

I am sure that many of them don't remember who the hell I am. Eight of them bounced back as undeliverable. What a great reminder to me that I really suck at keeping in touch with friends and family.

Had I not been the publicity whore that I am, I am sure that I would not have come to this conclusion.

On the plus side, at least now I know all the addresses in my list are functioning. Hell, I might even re-establish contact with someone I haven't spoken to in years.

I knew Chihuahuas were just big ass rats!

Ahh, the glory of the internet. Where else (other than the mainstream press) can stories that are completely fictitious spread like wildfire to millions of people?

Take this excerpt for instance:

Among other findings, the analysis determined that the Chihuahua is actually a type of large rodent, selectively bred for centuries to resemble a canine.

I first saw this posted on Politics Cafe as a joke. Since then, however I have received multiple emails due to the dubious seven degrees of separation family in which we are all now apparently a part of.

They all seriously touted this "fact." Of course, had any of them taken the time to check out the source (as I did) they would have seen that it was all just a big joke brought to us by the Watley Review - Page Three.

Minimum Wage

As it looks increasingly possible that that flip-flopping jackass John Kerry could be strolling the South Lawn come January, I am joyful that we have a system of checks and balances that will prevent him from committing such idiocies as raising the minimum wage.

Of course, this may also be wishful thinking on my part. All those mealymouthed statists that inhabit Capital Hill may very well go along with this so as not to upset their constituents.

Poor Choice of College

Apparently, I went to the wrong school. At no time during my years in higher education, did I get to take classes such as "Campus Culture and Drinking" or "History of Comic Book Art."

I knew I should have looked closer at those course catalogues.

Make a Straight Man Gay

As I was reading an article about Gay Marriage, I was reminded that both my best friend in Junior High and my best friend in High School, ended up being gay. I also seem to have an inordinate amount of gay/lesbian friends compared to the average straight guy.

I guess I must just put off some kind of weird pheremones or something. Now if I could just genetically alter those pheremones to 1) attract more straight chicks and 2) convert my friends to libertarians, then I would truly live a happy life.

Schlager Musik

I just spoke to a friend of mine from Germany. He is an all around talented guy, and one of the avenues he is pursuing is music. His latest venture is into Schlager Musik, which can best be described as somewhere between Pop and Easy Listening.

He said he reached #16 on the charts. So congratulations to him and here is his website (for those of you that speak German and enjoy that kind of music).

Sebastian Charelle

You can also check out his other projects here:

Dizzy Angels (pop music in English)

Dr Disco (dance music, in English)

Friday, June 25, 2004

Toilet Snorkel

What in the hell is going on here?

Some guy actually got a patent for this thing. It is supposed to help keep you from inhaling smoke during a fire.

It would be a sad day indeed when I was forced to choose between having my lungs scorched from the smoke of fire or breathing sewer air. If you think your own shit smells, imagine the bouquet produced by your entire neighborhood.

Girl Friday

Taking after another blog that I like to read, Gweilo Diaries, I have decided to institute Girl Friday.

Every Friday I will post the photo of another lovely girl to keep you guys coming back for future visits. Is this shamelessly using hot chicks to prop up otherwise weak content? Absolutely. By the way, on the odd chance that any hot chicks reading this would like to submit their photos, I will be happy to post them.

Without further delay, here is the inaugural Girl Friday.

Cannibal bastards

As I'm feeding my fish this morning, I notice a half eaten corpse floating on top. Upon further inspection, it is one of my two Bala sharks. Also, completely missing is my Chinese High Fin Banded shark (my favorite).

Last week, the little bastards ate my Black Ghost and prior to that, my frog.

Now mind you, this is not a tank with Oscars or the like. It is full of Tetras, Silver Dollars, Hatchets, etc. It is not as if I starve them, they get 2 squares a day

Thursday, June 24, 2004

Fuki Blog

So I finally decided to start a blog. Why? Because I am sure the lives of countless people have been empty and void of meaning until this point. I hope to bring purpose to those lost souls aimlessly wandering the Web. Barring that, I'll just keep posting so that I can see my opinions in writing.